Friday, June 26, 2009

Plabnox remembers Plabnox admiring MJ

In 2003, Plabnox Cures made the following breakthrough webpage to dispel controversy surrounding Michael Jackson's physiognomy. On the afternoon following his untimely death, we remember our webpage, reproduced here:

Plabnox Cures Presents...

An MJ Breakthrough!

Have the Pet Detectives finally discovered MJ's secret?

During the recent MJ interview on ABC, Pet Detectives Piggy Peggy and Penelope Ravioli both discovered, independently, what is the secret behind MJ's facial metamorphosis. Some have claimed it's an obsession with perfection, others that it's a sick addiction. But the Pet Dets have stumbled upon the real explanation: MJ is trying to become Peter Pan

First, take a look at some supporting facts:

  • MJ's home is called "Neverland"
  • MJ has multiple larger than life depictions of Peter Pan on his ranch
  • MJ said, during the interview, "I'm Peter Pan in my heart."
  • MJ has a childlike spirit
  • MJ relates to children on an emotional level
  • MJ wants to remain in his childhood, just as Peter Pan lived in eternal childhood
  • During the interview, MJ uttered the phrase, "I want to live forever."

The Pet Detectives sifted through scores of MJ and Peter Pan pictures hoping to find similarities between the singer and the Disney character. They did not come up empty-handed. Below are the results of their search and subsequent scientific analyses of certain pairs of images.

1. The Nose

Much ado has been made of MJ's nose. Some tabloids claim it is falling off, and an alleged plastic surgery expert recently asserted that MJ's nose is "beyond the point of no turning back." However, the Pet Dets have noticed that MJ's nose is in fact becoming increasingly pixie-like, i.e., more like Peter Pan's.

2. The Eye Region

In the pictures that follow, pay special attention to MJ's eyebrows and eye shape. The brows are thick and angled like Peter Pan's, and the eyes are lifted and less oblong.

3. The Entire Cranium

Don't let the trees block your view of the forest--you should pay attention to MJ's entire face, not just certain features. In the images that follow, the Pet Dets present whole-face analyses. Be sure to note similarities between MJ's and Peter's hair styles, cheekbones, and facial structures.

No comments: